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Saturday, 28 August 2010

How a night out can fail

On the assumption that everyone has been in this situation before. I.e having a great night out planned and then watching it wither up and die and leaving you to sit at home on your own mindlessly watching whatever rubbish just happens to be on tv until about 4am or some other ridiculous time. Mr.Character has listed a few of the more common ways in which an average night out will fail. Remember to bear these points in mind before you head out on a weekend

*YOU fail to plan anything - When you want to go out, and neither you nor anyone else has a plan. You spend hours of calling credit asking people whats happening, and they're busy doing the same thing. In order to have a guaranteed successful night out, you need to make sure that *someone* actively has a plan and you dont just assume someone else will plan, otherwise do it yourself.

*You don't have calling credit - The world doesn't come to you. If you can't communicate, dont expect anything to happen for you, simple enough.

*You spend too long on the internet - Counterintuitive, i know, if i want you to continue reading this blog. But yes. Facebook et al do practically FUCK ALL to help you out in the real world. For this reason, screw social network websites and go get some real friends.

*Leaving things to the last minute - As a general statement, you can't get your entire social circle out in 30 minutes. (unless your superman or something.) so you might wanna think ahead and have people know about the idea well in advance, an obvious point but yeah

*When your with people you dont like. - Its probably best to not go out in the first place if this is the case, unless there's some hot guy/girl there that you want, its not worth it.

*You get too intoxicated too early - Seriously, don't do this, if you can't hold your drink that badly, drink less, if you still want to look cool go sly and do something like buy a sprite but tell everyone its a vodka and sprite. Works every time (until they taste it)

*You NEED that kebab - No No No. IF your on someone. do NOT buy a kebab or food of this general description, you don't want to ruin a whole nights efforts by disgusting your accuired target at the last hurdle.

*You fail at life - Get a job, Captain Neckbeard!

As a general statement if you wake up anything like this:

Then you probably had a decent night out.

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